Childish Contradictions

This summer i am participating in the rearing of children. Through this i have learned that many things have changed since my youth (I haven’t yet got to the point where I have uttered  the dreaded, “when I was your age…”  but OH so close) and that children are walking contradictions. I have compiled some of these confusing qualities and i would like to share them with you;

A) Past and present - on one hand they are listening to NSYNC a band who's name has not been uttered in about a decade, however as they are listening to said boy band they can also practically make an unmanned drone out of their wii.

B) Memory – VERY selective, they can love one thing, say Star Wars, then the next day they don't even know where stars are located. Don't bother trying to remind them of their fondness of the force because they now believe that all the Star Wars paraphernalia that some how made it into every aspect of their lives and personal possessions came from aliens.

C) Attention to details - while I can get away with skipping 5 pages in the tale of Dora the Explorer Meets Mighty Mouse in Mongolia they know exactly how many crackers, and we are talking fish crackers here, usually too numerous to count… I gave to all those in the room versus how many I gave to them. Give me a break

D) Independence - on one hand they claim that they do not know how to feed themselves, therefore, they would like for you to chew up and regurgitate their food for them or delicately place peeled grapes into their gaping/peeping mouths while singing the theme song from looney tunes. However, in the next hour they feel that they are completely and totally prepared to make pasta with flambeed mushrooms over a bed of fresh greens.

And so as you can see the rearing raising and wrangling of children is not an easy task.  It will make the sanest of us crazy and I never professed to be in that group…  I will be relieved when the summer is over.